In our culture, it seems like “hurry” is considered a virtue. It almost seems like we view the length of our “to do” list as an indicator of our level of success, but what happens when “busy” isn’t working for us anymore? Keep reading for 3 Keys to Planning an Unhurried Life!
When “Busy” gets to be too much…Keys to Planning an Unhurried Life
To be honest, how can you NOT be busy as a mom? You keep up with yourself and your responsibilities, along with ALL the other details of your kids’ and spouse’s life.
Some days you hardly have time to drink your coffee while it’s still hot, or eat five bites of food while sitting still at the dinner table… How in the world are you supposed to balance all of the tasks and responsibilities AND still make time to connect with your kids on a heart level?
… and yet, isn’t that what they need most from us?
A mom who listens?
Who makes eye contact?
Who takes time to hug them when they’re upset?
A mom who sits still long enough to listen to their ideas?
A mom who isn’t in such a hurry to get from one thing to the next that she forgets to connect with the little treasures that are in her presence?
I can feel the mom guilt that those questions just dumped right on top of some of you. Just bein’ real – many days I feel that way too. I’m rarely as intentional, connected, and emotionally engaged with my kids as I would like to be… but you know what? I keep trying. I keep working at it. I keep working to cut back things from my schedule and find balance so that I have the margin that’s needed to foster that connection and emotional engagement that my children need from me.
Emotional engagement doesn’t happen by accident.
Slowing down long enough to connect with their hearts doesn’t happen without intentionality.
Our culture values activity, achievements, and accomplishments.
And they’re not bad things.
But our kids need connection with us first.
During the past 12 months I have had more responsibilities on my plate than ever before. And yet, I’ve been able to carve out time to be intentional about connecting with my kids. These are keys to planning an unhurried life that I’ve found to be true:
*Please Note: Some of the links below are affiliate links, which means that if you purchase the products, I will receive a small commission. There is no extra cost to you. I only recommend products that I genuinely use and love. If you do decide to use these links, thank you so much for your support!*
3 Keys to Planning an Unhurried Life:
1. Plan your time intentionally.
If you just let your days happen to you, you will get to the end of them and be frustrated that you didn’t get the most important things accomplished. In mom life there’s always some crisis or meltdown happening. If you haven’t planned your time intentionally, you will spend all of it reacting to the unexpected situations that come up.
Planning intentionally allows you to set the ideal pace or rhythm for your family.
I’m also willing to bet that you wear a lot of different hats throughout each day. In addition to keeping the tiny humans alive, you may also have the role of wife, housekeeper, personal chef and grocery shopper, chauffeur, coach, employee, volunteer, friend, daughter, sister, etc.
You need a planner that allows you to keep track of all the tiny details for each of those roles, without letting them get jumbled together! I had a hard time finding a planner that reflected the complex combo of roles and responsibilities that I have, so I made my own. I know you’ll love it!
Grab yours here:
2. Identify your priorities & schedule them first.
What are your main priorities for this season? Write those in your planner first. What is your focus for the week? The month? Write it down. Use habit tracker to keep track of small or big habits that you’re being intentional to develop. Once you’ve scheduled your big priorities first, you can see how the rest of your responsibilities fit in around it.
I would bet that many of us would say that our priorities are our children, our marriage, spending time with the Lord, exercising, etc… and yet, those are the things that we don’t tend to write on the calendar. We write our commitments on the calendar first, and then we hope that we can fit the important things around those. But when we do it that way, it’s too easy to overcommit ourselves.
Start by naming and identifying your priorities for this season and write them in your planner first. Give them your prime time if you can. Then write your commitments and other responsibilities in around your priorities. See how that changes the picture? Are there commitments that you don’t have the time for when you do it that way? Are you finding that you have too much on your schedule? See this post – Hope for the Hurried Mom: Tips for Surviving Until You Can Slow Down.
3. Be fiercely protective of your margin & say “no” confidently.
I have found that learning, connection, and relationships happen best in the white space on the calendar. It happens when we slow down and are able to make the most of each opportunity that presents itself. Hurry makes us irritable, and it causes stress on the whole family.
When we overcommit ourselves, we are doing a disservice to our whole family. It’s not enjoyable for anyone.
It’s okay to own your priorities in this season of life and graciously say no to everything that doesn’t fit into your schedule. You’re not saying no for forever, you’re just saying “not right now.”
If you struggle with knowing what to say “yes” to and what to say “no” to, or if you have a hard time saying “no,” I HIGHLY recommend you read The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst. It’s SO good!
Keys to Planning an Unhurried Life
Having an unhurried life doesn’t happen by accident. It takes great intentionality and planning. It takes constantly re-evaluating your commitments in light of your priorities to make sure you’re on the right track. But it’s so worth it.
Be sure to grab your planner before you go!